WHAT LIST SONGS CAN TEACH YOU

Is it getting any lazier in songwriting when it comes to the list songs? It can be great in the right moment. I am the Walrus is one the best songs ever written and it is simply a list of strange images. But hell is always round the corner and there's always a chance to get Girls Run the World for your sins. Why?
Because the world is the terrible place, obviously. One thing for sure - list song is a thing that needs a lot of skill to be a great piece of music. And since i'm the goofy guy on this blog, I've decided to list some of the better list songs for you to explore and think about. All of them are inventive as hell. You can learn a thing or two from them. By the way, this passage is just a filler. From this point - all killer, no filler.

***

List song is basically a form of conceptual writing where writer namedrops particular peculiar set of names and titles and actions and other things in a long-long lines of succession forming some kind of fuzzy freaky narrative.
Here are few colorful examples:

The NAILS - 88 lines about 44 women

For those of you who don't read Marc Campbell's posts on Dangerous Minds - why? That's wrong people, stop doing that! Anyway, once upon a time he fronted the band called The Nails and he wrote this song and it is roundabout awesome.
In 88 lines about 44 women we get whole life story through a simple succession of various females and their respective traits. It plays almost like some kind of Woody Allen's kaleidoscopic ramble-tamble screwball comedy in your head. Protagonist had a long and varied rough time. For example: "Vicki had a special way / Of turning sex into a song" or "Jeannie had this nightclub walk / That made grown men feel underage" or "Gloria, the last taboo / Was shattered by her tongue one night". It's a road movie where only the bottom lines are left. I hope one day Andrew Bujalski will adapt it into a feature film.

Tom LEHRER - The Elements 

Tom Lehrer was master songwriter who could write about anything in a fun and exciting way. Even about domestic abuse, but that's another story. But what he can do when there's just a bunch of terms which sounds like bullets piercing armor? He's pump it up to the eleven!
Obviously, this song lists all known elements and acknowledges the fact that there are many more to come in the future. The text itself is simple - titles of elements. It's the delivery that makes it shine. Lehrer takes out the melodies out of titles - brings their inner rhythms to the forth. They blend together into the tremendous sound forms. Every trace of sense burns out in the frenzied rickety-rack.
This song is a delight to perform for a jazz-scatter. Try it at home zealously.

Weird Al YANKOVIC - Bob 

Oh, boy! Weird Al may be a comedy artist in an industry where comedy is something deliberately second-rate and mysteriously not funny at all. But his songwriting skills are often on par and exceeding those who he parodies. This parody of Bob Dylan's Subterranean Homesick Blues is probably the best example of how he appropriates the song structure and makes something interesting with it. Palindromes are tough thing to do. It gets even tougher when you want to construct some kind of coherent narrative. Weird Al does it with such ease the only thing you'll think while listening will be "wow!". The stream of consciousness he delivers is captivating - detail upon detail, every step furthers the narrative. He builds a believable, albeit surreal world. It is easy to follow and there many things to notice on the second listen.

U2 - NUMB 

Numb song is notable from many points. It is a highlight of U2 experimental years. It's one of the few songs where god-awful Bono does something interesting. It has Triumph of Will sample, after all. And there's a fun video.
Lyrically it's a long-long-long list of restrictions punctuated by winding set of don't. Basically - it is conditioning, mental programming. The sheer mass of don't draws a fancy dystopia in your head. Morose voice of Edge underlines it. Then things start to get ridiculous and we get that its not about dystopia - it's about mental disorder where some kind of imaginary conspiracy thrives. Many persons teach one another on what to do and what no to do. It is creepy and you're engaged enough to follow through to the end.

EXTREME - Smoke Signals

Extreme was one of those bands I never really liked in my teens. They seemed to me something like a cock-rock Motley Crue version of Red Hot Chili Peppers covering Led Zeppelin on speed. Really weird stuff. Then I've embraced that bland weirdness and started to like their output. It is hard'n'heavy tongue-in-cheek. And i feel fine.
In this particular song singer Gary Cherone goes all-guns-blazing-Robert-Plant on the list of various warnings. For example: "Keep your elbows off the table / Look before you cross / Buckle up your seat belt / Parental discretion advised". There's nothing bad in those warnings. They just pile up and pile up and pile up until the breaking point on which the protagonist just gives up goes into complete nonconformity which leaves him dumb in the long-term prospect. Tragic story. Ha!